Should A Aspiring Content Creator Pal Cease Using Me for Material?

One Side: Beth

Sometimes I'm recorded while having a meal. It's jarring to spot myself on her Instagram – it feels like a sudden shock.

My best friend of a decade, she, calls herself the “content queen”. It can be amusing for a short while, but it strains our relationship.

She is an extrovert, there's a constant urge the need to document everything all the time. During meals out, her motto is, “The phone eats first,” and takes photos with bright lighting, which induces embarrassment. I don’t like it when other people see her performing for the camera – I experience vicarious awkwardness. It also frustrates me because meals lose their warmth.

She's not quite an influencer yet, but Marielle is trying to be. She creates vlogs about city life, her daily routine, and her styling career. The material is quality, I’ll give her that, but I don’t want to be dragged into it. On occasion she films me while dining, or simply tagging along. Later, I appear on her Instagram later, and it pops up like a jumpscare: I might be bare-faced, an awkward face or be captured mid-bite. It feels invasive.

She also expects me to record her at inconvenient times. Sometimes I'm in conversation to someone else, or we’ll just be hanging out in the street. I feel like our friendship has transformed into me being her free crew. She could easily employ someone if she wanted high-quality content. Upon mentioning my unease about the situation, she dismissed it. I've been invited to several brand events, which were appreciated, but that doesn't compensate for all the time and effort I spend assisting her make content.

I appreciate that Marielle has supported me with my design career, but I don’t want our friendship to become just a ledger of exchanges. I don't believe she’s fake or inauthentic, but sometimes it seems that if recording starts, we will begin acting in a way that makes us look good for her channel.

She will say, “Alright, smile for the camera!” and record me smiling with another. It’s so silly. It's crucial her to understand that our decade-long friendship still has boundaries. I enjoy spending time with her, but I also want to experience it without being recorded, altered, or shared for an viewers. I’m not a accessory for her online persona.

The Other Side: Marielle

I want my friend to see that the creations we produce together can get us an opportunity.

I am passionate about creating videos. It's more than a hobby; it’s part of who I am. Producing content and sharing my life online enables me to express myself and engage with people in new ways.

I don’t see myself as a full influencer yet, but it's savvy to make money from your interests. I look up to people on TikTok who pull off that style of casual, DIY content creation.

Content creation is my version of living actively: noticing the details, sharing them with an audience that values the art behind it. I never intend to make my friend uncomfortable. Taking her to professional gatherings was my way of offering access, giving her a chance to experience behind-the-scenes moments that could benefit her professional path too. That’s not leverage, it’s just being pragmatic.

I would take her to such functions even if she didn’t help me, but I want her to see the benefits the work we create together can get us: an opening. I understand not all people enjoys being filmed, but often unplanned moments is what makes content authentic. Being recorded occasionally is part and parcel of being my companion. I'd remove anything she asked, but she has never asked yet.

I don't demand anyone to be my personal videographer, but friends support one another in small ways. My assumption was recording a clip now and then would be fun for her. Creativity thrives in collaboration, and having Beth around makes projects lively and enjoyable. I don't compel her to participate in anything, and I would never intentionally humiliate her. But creating content jointly sometimes is part of how I record our time together.

I value our friendship profoundly and don’t want content creation to drive a wedge between us. I am ready to compromise: like asking before recording, and avoiding shots that might make her self-conscious.

This isn’t about control, it’s about expressing my perspective while still respecting hers. Clearly content creation is not a substitute for genuine friendship: it's merely part of how I experience life and I desire her to be involved in a way that’s enjoyable for each of us.

Outside Perspectives: Public Sentiment

Is it right for her to stop recording herself and her friend when they are out together?

Nothing is more excruciating than having a friend film you. I get that it's her passion, but I don’t make friends come to my workplace. Perhaps she can find influencer friends to collaborate with. With the uncertain future of AI, human connections are the only thing we have – cherish them!
A respondent, 25

When pursuing something as a career, it's unfair to expect your friends for help every time, even if they have helped previously. If Marielle loves shooting, that doesn’t mean everyone around her is willing material. She needs to respect Beth’s privacy.
Ankit, 26

Marielle might love producing videos and displaying her life publicly, but it’s not for everybody. It’s nice she has assisted Beth’s career, but she needs to hear what Beth wants.
Emma, 27

It seems like you value each other, so cling to that and ensure it’s the priority in your relationship. Foster some real memories, where genuine feelings are stored, not online archives. Even celebrities who seem to reveal their worlds actually have more privacy than it seems.
Sarah, 53

Marielle appears to be not fully engaged nor authentic when they're together – she's on the job. Both seem confused as to what’s reasonable. The solution lies not in trying to change one another, but in each setting clear boundaries around what feels acceptable to them and seeing if there is an mutually agreeable middle ground.
A final view, 71

Now You Be the Judge

Consider this question: is Marielle exploiting their friendship?